Wednesday, March 14, 2012
On the Edge.
Sometimes, it's not that I want to
It's that I've got no choice.
I don't like how this feels either.
But I am on the edge.
your name
wrote at ;; 1:04 AM
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
Trophy girlfriend
When I first heard of this phrase, I took it the positive way.
I interpretated it as how a guy would describe his girl
Best of the best in his eyes
A trophy deserving girlfriend.
I was then told of the negative connotation of this phrase..
Surprisingly, it's also the commonly used definition
It meant a showcase girlfriend,
One that was perfect in society's context
Therefore bringing pride to the guy himself.
It is not above love
Or embracing the strengths and weaknesses of your partner
Instead, it's selfish manipulation of one's feelings for you to satisfy your ego
This phrase doesn't only work for guys
Girls too, often search for the trophy boyfriend.
But that's not true love.
You will not feel true joy talking about your partner.
You will not be able to share the laughters and pain with him/her.
I am writing this because I just witnessed true love
Well I cannot judge for sure that it's true love or not
But I can be sure the couple is standing far from the trophy girlfriend syndrome
He isn't perfect. He does not have the best job,looks or wealth.
She isn't perfect. She does not fit into society's perception of a good wife.
They are getting married in a week.
The guy knows that on the day itself, his wife may be under public scrutiny
Due to the big tattoo on her back
Not socially accepted. Maybe not a socially perceived beautiful bride.
But a wife in his eyes.
Not a trophy. A wife he loves.
Be with somebody because you love him/her.
Don't do it because it will look good on you,
Or for whatever other reasons.
Love is distinct.
You'll know you're in love, because you'll feel it.
Till then, do not settle.
your name
wrote at ;; 3:02 AM
Monday, March 12, 2012
Love...It is when you can find 10000 reasons to not feel anythingBut you still do.
It is when you try your hardest to replace the emotions with rationality
But the emotions always triumph.
It is when the slightest things can make you smile
As you survive through even the worst things in your life.
It is when many times you feel like giving up
But that one thing always holds you back.
Now that is love.
your name
wrote at ;; 2:10 AM
Sunday, March 11, 2012
Unspoken
When I see the disappointments in your eyesMy heart breaks, it shatters.
I hate those despair you show me,
Close to hopelessness and defeat.
I decide to stay nonchalant
I don't want to be emotionally laboured along with you
Because I've got so many other things on my shoulders
School, and everything else.
I know I am selfish
But it's hard for me.
You raised me to be pampered like a princess
But now, I have to be strong and tough.
My heart hurts, it aches to see
What used to be my pillars of support
Fall down in front of me.
In these months I've learnt
To become silent and conserved
But deep down, my dear parents,
Do know that my heart never hurt more than this.
your name
wrote at ;; 1:59 AM
Saturday, March 10, 2012
unscathed
was radomly looking at fbs of friends i was once close to
drifted apart... not because of any disagreements,
but just because of the sheer fact that time just push us in opposite directions
as i looked at their photos, I realized that they actually do tell a story
your life story.
it's like.. I've not met a person for a long time, but I can get a feel of how she has been
through her photos.
real smiles, or just facades,
well i can't tell
but at least it's an avenue.
had the sudden urge to blog again
i guess it may be because of the studying
people say you get distracted most when you're doing something most important
anyway, i just wanted to blog
not about daily happenings that much
but just continue to try and pen down emotions and thoughts
so that one day,
when i forget myself, or forget how I've walked through a certain phase
I can look back at my blog.
thought of starting on a new blog add
thought i wrote too many silly things on this (well i was only 16 when i started)
but i decided
that was who i really was
that past made me who i am today
so i'm going to embrace them
not just brush them off as "some lame pasts"
laughed at some of my ah-lian lingo
cringed at some of the real pain I had to go through
wow-ed myself with how I was so good at keeping to formats (wonder where that has gone to)
and just reminded myself
how blessed I am, to walk out of my teenage years unscathed (at least no bad scars)
what phase am i in now?
a phase of self-searching
a phase of grasping who I really am inside.
starting to feel the age catching up
starting to actively do things to prevent my body from disintegrating
take up yoga, cardio, go for massages.
studying hard (most of the time) for my last two sems in UB
making many new friends
losing some old buddies. you.
piling up on the "regrets" basket
throwing in some "should haves" and "i wish i had
nevertheless
it's a journey
and i will walk through it.
and come out
unscathed.
your name
wrote at ;; 11:52 AM
