Cassandra Loh

Sunday, May 31, 2009

Icecream Makes Me Happy (:

yay the 3 weeks well deserved break has just started
and i think i am making quite good use of it already
(:

went for Australia Open Day yesterday
with bf, janice and janice's bf
found out even more about the unis there
and like the course fees, gpa required blablabla
saw byron there as well
think he also wanna go to some uni in queensland
cool then queensland will be like mini spore!
:p

so after AOD, went for dinner and then back to my home for mahjong session
haha
janice was saying we are getting more zai
but its kinda good cux we r preparing ourselves for Australia where the shops close at 5pm anw

mahjong khakis (:

the bfs have become buddies (they were playing restaurant city omg lol)

dunno why we all had lousy phototaking skills tt night
this is the best photo though its like SUPER unclear :X

then TODAY
although super tired from mahjong yest
i still went to parkway to visit saumun at Scoopz (handmade icecream go try!)
and got my free icecream!
haha first time okay not like tseyun so cheapskate :p

i am still amazed at how ice cream is made

skilled saumun "cooking" durian icecream (seems to be the most popular flavour)

ice cream makes us happy (:
i had the choc and he had the durian which he absolutely loved

yay i am so happy thanks to saumun! (: (:

sigh although i am happy that i dont have mid sem
there are still 10000 proj to be done!!

Labels: australia open day, ice cream, mahjong, scoopz

your name wrote at ;; 8:36 PM

Saturday, May 30, 2009

sorry my friend...

contemplating whether to blog about tonight's dinner
but decided to just post the pictures

went for cakes at cartel
dont reli have mood to describe so just pictures

two of my best friends

truffle cheesecake for grace

aunt amy's choc fudge for me

enjoying the cakes

mom gets to enjoy later cux i dabao-ed for her

best friends always

me and grace

me and qi

too dark

best we could take

feeling very bad now
i'm sorry i have been such a bad friend
my heart ached when i heard the news
please reply my call soon..

your name wrote at ;; 12:18 AM

Friday, May 29, 2009

I Love My Dogs (:

went back to school for the trash-it-out session
then was supposed to go home after tt but saw saumun on the way
and we chatted alot abt university of Queesnland
which i've checked offers Bachelor in Public Relations (:
i am now so MOTIVATED to do well for my last sem
i shall forget about the MICE test today grrr
i even checked on the accommodations there and all
haha i am so ready!

going out for dinner with grace and qi
and for once after A LONG TIME
i am going to be driven!!
i am not driving today and grace is picking me up
whee! (: (:

yay shall post some cuteypie pictures before going for dinner (:

the always handsome lucky!

for the past few days rascal has been making me envious by sleepin super early in my room
and he dreams alot! i wonder what he dreams about..

haha so cute man

only bad thing about having rascal in my room.. my soft toys end up having a nose or eye being chewed up =.=

yay so cute the rubber bands totally suit him (:

disclaimer: the rubber band is tied veryvery loosely so i am not abusing my dog.
in fact he love the rubber bands so much he started playing with them! :D

Labels: lucky, proj. reunion dinner, rascal, UQ

your name wrote at ;; 7:27 PM

SUCKY ENDING

indeed as the title of this post says
it is a sucky ending to the tests
it was an hour paper today
NOTHING CAME OUT FROM THE NOTES
relatively easy paper
CASE STUDY
50m

aircon in the lt was SPOILT
so it was STUFFY like mad
people were making noises cux it was just too HOT
i couldnt get my thoughts together
and when I FINALLY DID
1hour was up
25m flies away

there goes my hopes of gettin a 3.75 gpa for this sem
damnit
can somebody say something to make the situation optimistic
zzz...

Labels: sucky test

your name wrote at ;; 11:53 AM

As I Ponder...

its 3:15am
i am sorta done with my revision
so i started stoning away
and my thoughts just drifted to the reflections that gevin was talkin about
i realised there are many issues that i have yet dealt
i live by them day after day
i push them to a side and they accumulate
maybe it really is time to take them out of that dusty corner
and deal with them one by one
i guess there are times when we have to pluck up the courage
to remove the masks that we conveniently put up all the time
it doesnt have to be with someone
i just need to come face to face with these masks
and only when i have done that
can i be true to myself and the people around me

somebody shared this
the red indians believe in a diagram
whereby a triangle is surrounded by a circle
the circle represents your heart
when u first do something wrong
the triangle will move, and because of its sharp edge, it will prick you
however, as you continue to do the same mistake over and over again
the triangle will spin faster and faster
and soon, it will scrape out the insides of the circle (where the triangle used to touch)
when this happens, the triangle will not be able to touch the circle anymore
which means, it does not prick you anymore
which also means, you are numb to that mistake

an interesting quickie..
are we already numb to some of the mistakes that we are doing..

your name wrote at ;; 3:17 AM

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Last Paper!!!!

sigh.. i dont wanna study :(
i think as u grow older
u get less motivated to study
just one more subject
ONE MORE!!!
stay focused cass!!

today during public speaking class
this girl (i dont know her name :p)shared something quite interesting
she said

HAPPINESS = REALITY/EXPECTATION

expectation cannot be 0 cux in a fraction denominator cannot be 0 (if everyone rems maths :p)
so you still have to have expectations, but keep it lower than reality. then you will have happiness.
think she said smth like that
yep tts a quickie for today (:

going back to my notes soon
before that..
check this out!

i got an invitation to the showroom to see this pretty car(:
don't really like the exterior
but still, think its quite pretty (:

kay notes time!

Labels: CAR, MICE

your name wrote at ;; 6:46 PM

Reflect and Move On

during apel, gevin talked about stoppin to think and reflect
he said smth about ppl being too busy nowadays to stop and think
and i think tt is damn true
days past like nobody's business
and we seem to be fighting to just get through each day
we dont reflect about the past
we dont learn from our mistakes
thats a quickie to ponder about

then i met Denise yest coincidentally under her block
we chatted for quite some time
and i told her about what some ppl say about me
that i am high and mighty full of airs want people to worship and all the crap
and she pointed out something
which made me think
she said maybe its the car
like after i got a car
i interact less with people
its always me in my car rushing here and there
tts not totally untrue
like in sentosa in yr 2.2
aft school
all i will do is to rush into the car
blow the aircon and drive home
i never interacted much with my classmates
and its only recently tt i know
that on the last day of school in TAS
there was a junior in the square thingy (party)
I DIDNT EVEN KNOW ABOUT IT!!

so now i am very seriously contemplating on going on a car strike
hmm
i don't know how i will survive
but i guess thats a step towards a change
omg but i reli cnot imagine myself without a car now zzz

anyways
got a test tmr again
and again i still have 2 chapters
so just a short update!

bye!

Labels: CAR STRIKE

your name wrote at ;; 3:42 AM

Monday, May 25, 2009

People Who Make A Difference

its 2:05 on my clock
and i still have got 2 chapters un-studied
which actually seems fine
just that they are so short i could have finished it in the afternoon if i was more focused

this is the third time i am bloggin in a day
(which sorta shows how unfocused i am haha)

he blogged again..
but i am going to stop these lameass blog attackin
cux like saumun said
someone has to stop
and it shall be me
(:

i knew spencer was going to write a post to encourage me
so i kept refreshing and refreshing
at the back of my mind i was already expecting something like
don't be sad
or don't bother
but when i finally saw the post
it sorta caught me by a small surprise

Whenever you feel like every single detail of your life
is going to ruins and the stress and the pain and the suffering
and the sorrow and the emptiness threaten to bring you down and stomp all over you
know that God will help you come out of it
stronger and more loving and more caring and more compassionate every single time
and
Whenever you need a friend to remind you this, know that I will be here for you =]

maybe in this whole saga
i lost sight of what's most important
maybe this whole time
i have lost sight of THE most important thing
and today when these shit happen
i admit that i thought of the stewards
i thought of how they would analyze things from their point of view

committment is probably my weakness i realised
i am humbly admitting this now
looking back
from a past relationship, to cell, to trngs
i see committment playin a big role in causing the distresses
guess that's smth i have gotta work on

back to books..
before that

spencer.. thanks for being there for me
esp at the most trying times
though u often lame me, bully me, and bombard me with 10000 songs tt i dont like
i see a true friend in you
thanks bud

isaac.. thanks for giving your opinion
and telling me smth that i have been tryin to tell myself
but hearing it from you made the difference
and i did smile during tt convo so thanks (:

son.. i know it is tough for you
to not tk sides and remain objective
i just hope that
table tennis will remain as table tennis
and mother and son remains as mother and son
(:

and to my darling ben
thanks for just the hugs that helped me suck up my tears
thanks for leaving me alone when u know i needed to be
and thanks for coming back again when you know i just needed a big hug

okok dr. aloysius lee is calling me
i can feel it totally
bye for real!

your name wrote at ;; 2:04 AM

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Let What's Not Important Stay Un-Important

k i've calmed down
lol i was quite pissed jus now
but found a way to vent my anger
that is to play with my dogs (:
innocent dogs that are definitely not as complicated as man
this time i played with rascal more cux he was in my room so only 1 pic of lucky

lucky with his infamous soulful eyes

ever-naughty rascal

love this pic cux he look cutely distorted

pulling my sheets

and again

that's my darling rascal

thanks to those who talked to me

like immediately after i blogged

wow

haha

thanks guorong for tellin me not to bother about what others say

thanks qi for standing at my side

thanks grace for talkin to me so i wont go insane being pissed myself
i guess its reli these friends+dogs that make trying days not that bad

with you guys, i know that i will definitely not falter even in my worst times

please be as nice if one day i go bankrupt k :p

for now i shall finally pick up my gaming textbook to study for tmr's test

i've wasted enough time

feeling angry, sorry for myself, accused, etc

now its time to get myself together

and focus on whats important

bye!

Labels: dogs, gaming

your name wrote at ;; 5:12 PM

if life was a roller coaster, i am very much sure this is the lowest point of the ride

i'm trying to swallow all the misunderstandings and accusations
i've seen the word worship twice
and i am not sure if they know the meaning of that word
why on earth do i need people to worship me
i dont even think of myself as anythin great
in fact these years like my friends know
are shit for me
so many big stuff happened to me
that i dun give a damn about people worshiping me

sometimes i am just so tired about everything
i mentioned that i still like table tennis
like means like
i determine what i like
who are you to determine whether it is like or stubborness

"last year and the year before we don't have enough players that's why we had to find her to come back and play for us" (i've been thinkin, who is us?)

"now she stubbornly refuses to leave, which is absolutely unacceptable for me, because when she comes back, the team's morale will be affected negatively to a certain extent"

this is quoted from the captain's blog
exact word for word
the other time i felt that wad he said to me was harsh
but i had no proof
and calmly thinkin, it may be cux we interpreted it differently
like i felt that it was harsh
but he didnt mean for it to be

but this time
i quote these 2 sentences straight from his blog
i never changed a single word
he also said that i was making up stories to make myself sound pitiful
what stories did i make up
all i said was that i was quarrelin with him and thats why i am not gg for trng
which i got comments that was an unacceptable reason
in which i accepted and apologised in my previous post
so if people know thats the reason
whats the sob story that he thinks people know?

i wonder if what he said he is speaking for the team and committee
or just for himself
cuz i went for trng on fri and it felt fine
unless everything was a facade as well

damn i am jus so tired to walk on

your name wrote at ;; 2:11 PM

HACKED

my msn and hotmail account got hacked
only found out when i keep getting signed out of msn
used my other account to go online
and realised that i was still online on msn
zzz
decided to change to a damn difficult password
hehe see who still can hack my acct

wanted to mug for exams today but only managed to study abit
and this is because of
tong xiao mahjong yest with bf, jan, jan's bf
time flew like anything
didnt even realised tt it was alr like 5 plus (or was it 6)
lol

cant wait for next week to be over (3 tests)
i need my short 3 weeks break
its very much well-deserved this time
(:

before i end

HAPPY 21st BIRTHDAY ISAAC CHONG
finally saying this after 4 years (:
have a great year ahead! :D

a picture that i left out
from babes' night out (:

Labels: birthday, hacked, mahjong

your name wrote at ;; 3:22 AM

Thursday, May 21, 2009

Pissedddd

i am in the midst of chiong-ing project
when i suddenly got pissed off by a blog post of someone
and the danger of saying someone is because
it is unclear and others may think it is them
so i wanna disclaim

son this is not about you
we have met our set of problems and quarrels before
but they were ALWAYS solved
and this is just a small thing
which is so freakin external that i dun see how it should even affect our friendship
the previous post wasnt for you either
so dont worry

aiyah on second thoughts
i shant broadcast again about what he said about me in case he gets pissed again
just wanna say
this is the MOST bitter friendship i have ever had
and you tell me that people think bad about me and have bad things to say about me
i wanna ask you
who doesnt get backstabbed by others?
at least i have a bunch of TRUE friends (i hope you do)
whom i am sure do not talk bad about me
oh but on a side track
he said i was broadcasting to the world with regards to the post that was about him
which was half true actually
cux i just realised that i have readers from switzerland ( i am guessing shawn), ireland, germany, malaysia etc
haha quite shocking
HI WORLD (: (:
but anyways, i dont want this to be some petty thing lah
though it seems to be already lol
but i am just angry la cux i reli dislike being accused
hey boy you treaded on my tail

this table tennis thingy is just a small thing
and while the people involved are not making a big hoo haa about it
some non related people have to do so i dunno why
I HAVE NOT QUIT THE TEAM
and
I WILL BE GOING BACK
hope that clears any misunderstandings
and i am sorry to the team for not coming for trainings
i know it is my fault on my side to not come because of some small disputes
yea that all

going back to my projects
gosh you wasted so much of my time
-.-

your name wrote at ;; 12:07 AM

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

REJECTED

sigh this is the first time i taste rejection from a job
when i saw the email my heart dropped
i got rejected by meritus mandarin :(
this is such a bad news..
zzz

now i gotta chiong my two individual assignments
which are all due on friday
so many things to do
but so little time
sigh..

ahhhh what a bad day!!!
:( :(

Labels: rejected

your name wrote at ;; 7:11 PM

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Happy Birthday Spencer Paw (:

yay somebody's 20 already
2 big candles (:
met the birthday boy for dinner at a steamboat buffet place at beach road
i enjoyed it more than he did i guess
then we went to pasir ris beach
where i gave him my surprise (:

*smelly* durian puffs to replace boring birthday cakes

spencer with his fave durian birthday cake :p

make a wishh!

and blow off the candles

oh and this is a spastic look of how nice the durian puffs were in his mouth

and we cheers for the first time like some ahpeks

happy birthday dear friend (:

may your 20th year be a happier one for you

thanks for being such a great friend,

and thanks for being by my side when i needed a friend

sigh this is supposed to be happy post for spencer

but jus wana rant abt some stuff

the table tennis hoo haa is gettin kinda out of hand

and i am dragged into it as well

from my point of view,

people have different priorities, and different levels of liking for everything

some people like table tennis to the maximum that they can forsake EVERYTHING else for the sport

some may be like bf who likes it so much he played it semi-professionally but knows when his career comes to an end

some may just wanna play to win and not care abt anythin else

some may be like me, who love the sport, had the most wonderful memories with the sport, and thus DO NOT WANT TO FORSAKE THE SPORT

some may be like tseyun who just wanna keep playin the sport to stay fit

i guess different people have different reasons why they joined the team

and noone can criticise anyone for their reasons

recently tseyun is thinkin of quitting

and she got REPRIMANDED (i insist on using this word)

i am not trying to stand on her side

in fact, regarding the PT, i stand on the committee's side

cux i know that the PT that they do is useful

but maybe she joined the team with a different motive?

she just wanted to enjoy the game, HER game

and when she saw that PT was compulsory, she decides to leave

so that she will not AFFECT the rest of the team

paul did suggest that she could be EXEMPTED

but she knew that would affect the rest of the team

but what did you do?

you REPRIMANDED her

and you made it sound like bcuz of this 1 decision

she will fail in her life

that she is relying on her mom now

and that she will fail in future?

who are you to determine that?

you say its the attitude

but if she is doin the game leisurely,

and she doesnt find leisure in the game anymore

then what has that got to do with attitude?

perseverance? endurance?

comeon she just wants to play to keep fit

jus like how we go joggin jus to keep fit, but not train like track

and when she realises that her goal is different from the team

she chooses to leave

simple as that

i dont see why you have to link it to everythin else

=_=

haiz..

its reli sad to see friendships of years being DESTROYED and JEOPARDISED cux of a sport

we are talking about years here..

3, 5, 7 years of friendship

down the drain like that

nt only tseyun

even i am affected

when i haven decided to quit yet

moreover the friendships that i am talking about are friendships that went thru so much tog

the ups and the downs

dont know if these ppl remember

but the downs that we went thru together were actually one of the most intense ones

some of the biggest downs in my life were spent with these people

be it studies, relationships, etc

we experienced our downs before tog

but because of table tennis

JUST TABLE TENNIS

the memories can jus be written off

i am just disappointed and upset

what reli defines true friends?

this is a sucky feeling

the feeling of losing people that are important and significant in my life

anyways

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SPENCER

(: (: (: (: (: (: (: (: (: (: (: (: (: (: (: (:

hope that made the post happy at the ending too

Labels: celebration, friends, spencer's birthday, steamboat, tabletennis

your name wrote at ;; 1:08 AM

Friday, May 15, 2009

Public Speaking

" Good afternoon. Today i will like to talk about failure. Failure is a word that everybody shuns. Open the papers and you will see many news of people who either choose to escape from their failure, or just simply choose to deny that they have failed. And what's the most common way of escaping? The answer is suicide. It is heartwrenching to see the number of suicide cases rise. It makes me wonder, are people just too proud to lose, or are they afraid to start over?

I have had a failure in my life that impacted my life greatly. In 2006, I was a happy student in Temasek Junior College. However in 2007, I was crying almost everyday i entered those gates. I scraped through my promos in JC1, and teachers were telling me that JC wasn't for me. I took them personally, and felt that the whole world was against me. I got depressed, and started skipping school as I did not want to see these teachers that "hated" me. However one day, a teacher that i respected most told me, "Cassandra, sometimes you just have to admit that you hav failed." This struck me. I realised that all those times that i skipped school, were just a form of escapism.

I picked myself up. It was far from a smooth ride. I switched to a poly, and had to face my ego. In fact, I had to conquer it. The good thing was, I didnt have to go through that alone. My family, friends, and surprisingly, the teachers that I thought hated me, supported me all the way. Now I am a happy student again, on my way to gettin a diploma. I survived two years, and i am starting on my third. Looking back, I'd not be as happy as I am if I did not admit that hiccup in my life.

To conclude, I think that people just have to recognise the fact that failures are just stepping stones for us to become a happier and stronger person. Allow the people around you to help you brave through the night, and you will definitely see the break of dawn. Bottomline, do not give up hope.

Thank You."

this was my public speaking speech for today
Carolyn said it was good
she said i had good content
i saw the audience listening attentively
not one of them were bored
they liked my story
they bought it
but what about me
do i buy it?
i probably buy 10% of this speech

yest during the SIP interview
the lady said
life in a hotel industry is like a stage
everything is fake and you have to wear masks

maybe not only the hotel industy is like this
life is like this
we all wear masks of different kinds
just to save ourselves from the judgin eyes of others

we're all actors on the stage, so we have to be professional about it

Labels: masks, public speaking

your name wrote at ;; 12:37 AM

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

One Year Finally!

damn tired..
duno wads with me these days
sleep like usual.. 6 hours
but VERY tired :(

went for my first interview for SIP
at meritus mandarin hotel
think i was too nervous and all
but i shall just wait for the results i guess
what will be will be (:

after interview went with darl to airport for popeyes
went with my hair still gel-ed =X
its our __________ anniversary
spent simply cux i was reli just too tired
sorry darl for not being THAT excited about it.

dun mind my damn neat hair lol

silly look

imagine if i had my hair done up like this everyday

haha supposed to be ugly but both of us ended up actin cute more

yay happy simple couple

darl.. thanks for everything you've done for me

thanks for taking my bad tantrums with less than a pinch of salt

thanks for giving me the most amount of trust and freedom in the world

thanks for keepin quiet when i throw my temper at u cux i'm tired

you're the silliest sweetie i know

i love you (:

silly look again (:

ps: i've finally reached a yr! no more triangle plate in my car!! (:

Labels: anniversary, meritus mandarin, sip, tired, triangle

your name wrote at ;; 11:11 PM

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Babes Night Out!

yea as the title suggests..
it was BABES night out yest!
we had a night filled with activities
we had to do our hair, attend sarah's surprise birthday party, go for a photoshoot, and lastly party!

so first on the list was to set our hair and make up for the night
mine was easier so had to wait for janice cux her hair needed a haircut

what else could i do to pass time right (:

hair and mk up done (:

hairstylist eddie doin janice's hair

yay all set (:

second activity for the night was to attend sarah's surprise party
she's 20
which reminds me..
i am gg to be 20 soon
my oh my

the bday girl blindfolded

me and teddy at the party (:

mac party was hmm
quite fun la
but the food was reli too lil for us to last the night
so we went for another meal at a hk cafe

beef noodles (:

went for our photoshoot
before starting the party
free entry and we hopped 3 bar/clubs
janice was amazed by my canon hehe
so we had our own photoshoot this time
thanks to her bf who became our photographer for the night

at lunar

one of the nicest pic of the night (:

oh and yea yea

that time janice actually recommended that face shop's masks are good

so i bought to try

and indeed its reli effective

you can see the difference with just one mask

and to make it better

use it everyday (:

i choose to keep to myself

Labels: hairstylin, parties

your name wrote at ;; 12:48 AM