i must say.. the template thingy is mkin me lose interest in bloggin.. but o wells..shall fill in abt my life..
err.. on sec thoughts.. shall jus write bout today..
went to church in the morning to help out with the holy week stuff.. learnt to fold a cross with ketupat leaves, and it reli looks cute (: whilst busy teachin the kids (ok i meant sec 1-4) how to fold, i saw the passion in their eyes for the crosses they were mkin.. at the same time, i knew they were lost sheeps.. all of them.. reli wanted so badly to tell them of this God who loves them..
one of the activity was also to nail their qns or messages about God on this plank.. like reli usin nails and hammers.. i walked past and saw qns like,
"when will i die?" "where is God" "where are You" "will i get 10 As?"
these qns come from mostly non christians.. qns tt show they r reli lost.. i posted a qns too.. do You see me when i am sad?
i noe e ans.. jus.. knowing and having the faith sometimes is reli 2 diff things..
aft tt, had a friendly debate with my uncle ( who is 19 who is pastor Loh's son :P) and he's my uncle!! haha.. anw.. we were debating abt emo kid. he says they are jus wellowing in self - pity.. i feel tt there must be a reason why they want to hurt themselves. unless u certify tt they are insane. maybe they lack the love, maybe they reli feel vv hurt.. i feel we shd go into their lives and und them.. hehe.. and pastor koh came in jus in time, and sided me!! hehe uncle u lose!
anyways.. den i sat in the church library waiting for trng at TP to start.. there, i fin reading the book daniel gave me-- from faking it to finding grace.. reli good book (: aft tt, i reli stoned there for awhile.. den i decided to take a walk outside e library, and i saw pastor Koh.. act at tt moment, i got alot of things to share with him tt previously he asked but i couldn share.. jus when i was abt to share, shao wen jie came, and we started talkin abt my decision to poly etc.. "if u were my child, i would beat u to death for choosing this route"she said :(
pastor koh had to go so we didnt talk.. he lent me a book, and left.. i decided i didnt want to stay in church too, so i left despite being early.. on my way out, i saw eileen.. she was super early for MM pract.. she's e WL, and she was so early.. we decided to go 85 market for dinner..
at first it was alittle weird.. aft all, i never talked to her like personally b4.. so was abit.awkward.. but soon, we talked alot.. and reli.. touched onto topics tt, we nv would share normally.. she shared her story, and i listened, vice versa.. we chat for like 2hrs? many things tt i tot she wun understand she understood, and many she tot noone will und i did.. guess it was His plan tt we met outside church.. nice talk sis ! (:
guo rong called to say trng cancelled.. i was like.. wad!! i waited for nth. but then i was reminded.. if i didnt stay, wouldn get to talk to eileen, and if there was trng,i would have wasted money tkin cab.. :p so since no trng i went up to church again, to watch MM prac..
as i listened to the songs, i tot abt wad shao wen jie said, and wad eileen said.. and sudd i felt.. so.. lousy.. but now im fine... (: i guess worldly standards will have to stay, so prob i dun meet to worldly standards tts y..
thanks mr wilson for talkin me out and being there.. for listening to me whine and sulk.. and thanks for the 4 reasons why i will do ok in poly, esp the 1st, 2nd and 4th one.. (:
prob i jus dun meet the world's standards..
prayer: -mr wilson to feel better and get his intimate walk with God back - students in AHS to feel and see God's love, and soften their hearts - cui fen jie and jia mi jie who seem to be sick - tmr's prog to go well - me sending in my withdrawal tmr - my walk with Him to be back on track - my old habit comin back -me not to dislike mr moi for irritating me
