hmm.. seems like a long time since i blogged. yea.. i feel that i am gg on fine.. i feel that there is absolutely no prob with me. no doubt i haf faced alittle problems like in church and school's stress... but i believed tt i culd cope with it. i believed that i wun be affected so easily. i believed that i wun be so weak and so easily brought down. but i realised that was wrong all the while.. we are NOT as strong as we think.. lemon. u once said tt u r stronger than u think. i chose to believe it too.. but i realsied that it is not exactly correct. this is bcuz. sumtimes when u think that there is nth wrong with u.. or u think tt u will be able to overcome any difficulties, u will be proven wrong by the medical science field. i jus got proven dat i haf been defeated by all the stress and all the prob dat i haf faced. lost to it. psychatrist seem to be the word e doc can sae onli.. it gets abit irritating. till now i m sure that my MENTAL IS COMPLETELY FINE! i m not under tt LARGE amt of stress tt i need to see a psychatrist or receive any treatment.. DUH!! but all i get is.. sumtimes unconsciously u r breaking down but u duno. "dun bottle up ur feelings" says alot of pple.. but hu is reli dere to listen? hu ca see thru u and understand u? i used to think tt ppl hu wrote this kind of things are reli weak. they cant even control themselves?! but..ironically. now here i am.. writing all these crap.. funny isnt it.. there r sum pple hu always think tt they r weak.. and they dun dare to believe tt they can do anythin.. den there are another type of pple hu think they r coping all fine.. and act.. they r not.. wad type am i? guess?! i was both.. WAS.. at first i tot i culdn do anything bcuz im too dependent.. den when i like try to get myself up.. i end up weaker than i tot i was.. this period i muz reli thank GOD for being there for me.. how true it is that he wun forsake u at all no matter wad happens.. i let HIM down many times. i noe i did.. sumtimes i evenn let him down with me knowing that i am.. like when i noe i m not supposed to do smth, i still do.. and let him down.. but HE forgives and accept u again.. HE nv leave u in a lurch even if u r like.. a pathetic little thing in this huge world.. all the pple hu r reading this but not yet christians.. sum times when pple ask u to go church or to like try accpetin or understanding GOD, dun close urself up! y not jus try listenin and understanding.. and maybe pray for HIM to cum into u... i m sure u wil reli feel HIS presence. bcuz HIS presence is so strong. no one can force anyone to believe in wad they dun wan to. but then.. u always shd give urself a chance to see this whole situation and feel HIM. okok i shall jus stop here.. i m not forcing anyone yea? jus trying to like.. share.. yea.. okok.. also i wan to thankhim for being there for me all along. thanks u.. i understand iand i agree that we bot shd not haf so many "things" tog anymore bcuz it wun do u or me good.. so i will stand up. i promise tt i will yea? and u too muz stand up k.. memories will still be in us la.. jus tt.. since it is impossible, we shd jus stop being like TOOO xlose. but this period of time reli thank u for helpin me.. duno y but i feel that u haf changed alot already. =) i will bravely face WED.. e doc appointment.. hopefully he wun see smth wrong with my mental.. bcuz im totally unexpecting it.. tml is the 30th anniversary concert.. BALLET.. muz SMILE.. SMILE is thre word.. no frowns, no tempers... ok cassandra? sorry to all my frieds if i haf thrown my temper at u.. i haf reli been to o frustratred with so many things le.. Reli so sorry.. I reli didn’t mean to like.. throw my temper at all of u.. sumtimes I jus dun feel like talking.. or like I was thinking of too many things le.. I will soon be back and =) de… and to my mummy./. though I noe she confirm wun read and she’d beta not!!! But to her :
your name
wrote at ;; 11:35 PM